(RNS) — Throughout the vacation season, Britt Hartley, a former Mormon turned atheist non secular information, urges nonbelievers to see spiritual traditions as a “field of heirlooms” and resolve what’s price conserving.
“Every individual has a field as a result of almost all of our ancestors have been spiritual,” Hartley stated. “Undergo that field and resolve what you need to preserve.”
This yr, Hartley’s tree is adorned with Harry Potter-themed ornaments.
“It’s the story that my youngsters are having essentially the most enjoyable with proper now,” Hartley stated. “And I like story.”
Fifteen years in the past in Boise, Idaho, Hartley started questioning her religion after researching The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints’ custom of polygamy. A brand new mother on the time, with the primary of her 4 kids, Hartley felt unable to get previous the hurt she believed the apply inflicted on ladies throughout the church. She initially assumed she had merely been born into the mistaken religion. However whereas pursuing her grasp’s in utilized theology, with a give attention to Gen Z spirituality and the way forward for America from Northwind Theological Seminary, she misplaced her perception in faith solely.
“I had a giant darkish evening of the soul,” Hartley stated. “I needed to face existential fears as a result of now I assumed: I’ve no God, no beliefs, no group. I’ve nothing.”
Britt Hartley in her workplace. (Picture courtesy of Britt Hartley)
Ultimately, by creating what she sees as “a secular spirituality,” finding out philosophy and exploring methods to fight nihilism, Hartley says she has rebuilt her non secular life in a means that’s genuine to her.
“Now the factor that I most need to do is assist folks discover significant, even non secular lives with out forcing them to imagine issues that they only don’t imagine,” Hartley stated.
Identified on-line as No Nonsense Spirituality, Hartley makes use of TikTok and her digital teaching apply to information people in creating purpose-driven lives by way of a non secular method free from conventional spiritual frameworks. She teaches programs on matters equivalent to non secular reconstruction and nihilism restoration and offers teaching to assist people heal from spiritual trauma.
At dwelling, she practices beekeeping as a type of non secular engagement. Whereas she doesn’t view astrology, crystals or tarot playing cards as “capital T true,” she acknowledges their potential to encourage introspection and help private non secular progress.
In April, she printed a guide titled “No Nonsense Spirituality: All of the Instruments, No Religion Required,” which offers step-by-step strategies for such practices as meditation, gratitude and mindfulness.
“There’s something to be stated for music, ritual and hope,” Hartley stated. “If I will be part of these issues with out having to carry out literal perception, I believe you get basically the advantage of each worlds.”
This month, Hartley shares recommendation for nonbelievers going through spiritual household dynamics, “triggering” traditions and difficult conversations throughout the vacation season.
In her metaphorical heirloom field, Hartley has stored the custom of adorning a Christmas tree, consuming clam chowder each Christmas Eve and saying grace earlier than dinner.
“All of us maintain fingers and say a quote from Lilo and Sew,” Hartley stated. “Ohana means household, household means nobody will get left behind or forgotten.”
For her 4 younger kids, Hartley avoids instructing them some particular biblical tales, together with the atonement of Jesus and his dying and resurrection, as a result of she believes they carry harmful concepts. As an alternative, every year she and her household add straw to a small ornamental manger, resembling the one Jesus was born in throughout the Nativity scene. Her kids are inspired to put a bit of straw in it each time they carry out an act of kindness.
“It’s one thing I did a very long time in the past,” Hartley stated. “Jesus is one thing that I can positively meet with this vacation.”
The “sorting hat” from the Harry Potter collection sits atop the Christmas tree in Britt Hartley’s dwelling in Boise, Idaho, on Dec. 22, 2024. (Picture courtesy of Britt Hartley)
Concerning Jesus, Hartley encourages nonbelievers to take the time to study him as a historic determine, whereas additionally exploring the potential of constructing a brand new, extra private reference to him as a mystical determine.
“It’s useful to take out a few of the supernatural fact claims and give attention to the homeless radical mystic whose parables are nonetheless inspiring to me whilst an atheist,” Hartley stated. “Principally, renegotiate your relationship.”
She suggests studying the Gospel of Thomas, a noncanonical assortment of Jesus’ sayings that focuses on private non secular information and enlightenment. Hartley additionally says the work of American New Testomony scholar Bart Ehrman, who explores the historic context of early Christianity, Jesus’ life as a historic determine, and the event of the Bible, is an efficient useful resource.
On the most elementary stage, she encourages nonbelievers to analyze the importance of Jesus and his teachings. “It’s one thing price digging into that may provide help to to fulfill the vacation in an genuine means,” Hartley stated.
For a lot of, the vacation season means visiting household, which regularly entails spending time with individuals who maintain beliefs they now not share.
“I’ve very deep and intimate relationships with folks in my life who’re Trump voters and energetic Mormons,” Hartley stated. “The way you get there may be by specializing in that human to human connection that’s beneath beliefs.”
She encourages nonbelievers to give up the impulse to debate or confront spiritual fact claims instantly and as a substitute method members of the family with empathy and respect.
“An important factor to do is to ask your self: What are the core values of this believer I care about in my good friend or household group?” Hartley stated. “Seeing the great thing about another person’s core worth, although it’s totally different than yours, can will let you admire who they’re.”
Core values can embrace loyalty, authenticity or truth-seeking. Hartley suggests discovering widespread floor that transcends theological or political divides. This method, what she calls creating “the muscle of intention,” can permit for significant dialogue with out triggering defensiveness.
Transcending theological or political divides typically requires heartfelt, seasonal inspiration, and Hartley finds it in tales like her favourite Christmas carol, Henry Wadsworth Longfellow’s “I Heard the Bells on Christmas Day.”
“It brings me to tears,” she stated.
The poem, written throughout the American Civil Struggle, contrasts the joyful sound of Christmas bells with the sorrow of a person grieving the lack of his spouse and little one whereas witnessing the ugliness and despair of a world at conflict.
“He has this second the place, regardless of every little thing — his nation torn aside, his little one dying, and his spouse gone — he nonetheless finds one thing stunning about humanity,” Hartley stated. “That there’s one thing price preventing for.”
This results in her ultimate piece of recommendation for nonbelievers: to try to see Christmas time as a time to pause, collect with family members and honor one another. Even and possibly particularly for the nonreligious, Hartley says this season is about reminding ourselves of what’s good about humanity: singing collectively, holding fingers, persevering with traditions, exchanging presents and expressing our love for each other.
“All of that also feels sacred to me, and it’s what I need to carry ahead,” Hartley stated.
This text was produced as a part of the RNS/Interfaith America Faith Journalism Fellowship.
